Hot Mess of the Week!!

Why is this a hot mess?

Sweetheart knows she is dead wrong for partying in the club! not at home! but in the club, with her mom at that age. Hell, that might be her grandma. What in the world is she doin in a club posing with the old reggee dance finger point?!!!

No teeth, no dentures, no nothing, just a drink and her two step!!

And ontop of all that is sporting the blonde look with her stomach out!!! This is not a laughing matter to me. Exuse my french but this is some sad sh#@!.... If i evvvver caught my mom or my grandma or any aunt in the club like this, id be making a scene and they'd be making an exit asap!

Maybe thats just me though...Your observation?

How you doing?

Every halfway decent woman in America hears these three words just about everyday she steps outside of her residence, atleast 3 times a day. "How you doin?" Sounds simple and quite courteous I guess. But when you get a lil analitical and pay attention to reaction, you realize those 3 simple words can damn near be the worste thing to say to a woman at times.

Think about it. Women here these words so often, many times from some dude who really wants to know more than how she's doing, that they can smell it coming from the time they first spot dude spotting them. Most times they give a simple reply. "Fine." Slight smile, and keep stepping.

Unfortunately a lot of dudes are quite thirsty, and that reply doesnt really fill the glass. Expecting more than that, its a must that this female furthers the conversation or she can put money on hearing something a little more disrespectful next time around. Sad but true. I know a handfull of females who go through this so many times in one day, that those 3 words have become a RED FLAG...

Sounds crazy, and foreal it looks crazy when take for instance, Im walking in or out of a public place. A female is headed in the opposite direction and we happen to meet at the door. Now in my mind, even if my first thought is "shorty is bad!!!" ...My initial reaction would never be to jump down her throught. If I were to get at her it would be more so we just happen to start conversing while standing in the same vacinity, or the eye contact gave off an obvious vibe of more than just a walk by.

Considering this, whenever I do happen to come across a womans path in public, out of common courtesy (especially if we're close enough to be breathing on one another) its second nature for me to say "how you doin". More often than not, I get the same in reply with a smile, and thats that. We're on our merry way. But every now & then I get that female who will just keep walking or give this look like her face stinks. I guess she didnt hear me! lol..Nah she heard me. But see I dont get upset or turn around and try to make it a point to let her know that I know she heard me speak. Because I underdstand there is a reason for everyone's reaction to anything. Maybe she's conceited. OR maybe she's just had so many dudes approaching her for all of the wrong reasons, and unfortunatley "how you doing?" had to be their first words. OR maybe she's just having a f-ed up day. We'll give her the benefit of the doubt. Whatever the case, those are 3 different possibilities that I want none of, therefore its nothing for me to keep it moving and know that I was only being courteous.

But some dudes just cant manage that for some reason. Some dudes want her so bad that if she walks by and doesnt bother to stop and give him a chance at shooting his game, he might just kurk out and start saying anything! Then it becomes a verbal altercation, which usually ends with her pissed off and dude even more pissed because he didnt get a number, and definitley ruined any chances of getting any action from her or any female standing around. All of this started with a "how you doin"......

My point? My dudes, if you cant handle the possibility that she might just keep walking without replying for whatever reason, you might want to hold off on trying to be courteous. And if you're trying to get at her....Lets just say unless your swagg is up to par and you know you're gonna get that conversation, find another opener. "How you doin" is the more respectable and common greeting, true indeed..But it has become the two headed monster. It can go good and bad at the same time. Wait, nah let me correct that. If you're a "ay shawty" type dude or a "sppp spps" type of dude, maybe you should stick with how you doing. Becasue all that ay this and ay that isn't gonna get you in the door. Just know that if she ignores you, it might not have anything to do with you and everything to do with her or what she's experienced throughout the day. "How you doing?" Cant live with it cant live without it.

Ladies, its simple. If he say "how you doin?" ....Atleast say it back! You might be saving yourself a lot of extra b/s....But if you smell the b/s coming before he gets that far, I aint even mad at you. Keep it moving.

With that said..........(women)

What are you're intitial thoughts when a guy greets you? Are you already assuming he wants something or do you take it as common courtesy?

Sucker For Lust

MOST OF US IF NOT ALL OF US AT SOME POINT AND TIME HAVE FALLEN TO WHAT WE THOUGHT WAS "THE LOVE BUG" ...BUT WHAT WE THOUGHT WAS LOVE WAS THE LUST BUG!...SOME OF US STILL FALLING.

A COUPLE OF OFTEN SEEN SITUATIONS. JUST BROKE UP WITH YOUR EX A COUPLE MONTHS AGO. TALKING TO A NEW FACE ON THE PHONE, YOU GO OUT HERE AND THERE. HE/SHE JUST SEEMS TO BE MORE PERFECT FOR YOU WITH EVERYDAY THAT PASSES. A MONTH OR TWO GOES BY AND NOW YOU'RE IN LOVE! OR ARE YOU?

YOU SEE THESE PAST COUPLE MONTHS WITH THE NEW FACE ARE OBVIOUSLY GOING TO BE SOMEWHAT PERFECT, WHEN YOU ACTUALLY TAKE A MINUTE TO THINK..YOU'VE SPENT HOURS ON THE PHONE TALKING ABOUT WHAT WENT WRONG WITH THE EX, WHAT HE/SHE DIDNT DO, WHAT THEY DID THAT PISSED YOU OFF, WHAT THEY SAID ETC....AS YOU'RE EXPRESSING THAT, THE NEW FACE IS TAKING MENTAL NOTES AND AS YOU SPEAK, COUNTERACTING WITH EVERYTHING THAT WOULD SEEM TO BE THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF THE EX YOU ARE DESCRIBING..SO OFCOURSE THE NEW FACE SEEMS TO BE THE BEST THING SMOKING! YOU'VE JUST HANDED OVER ALL THE ANSWERS TO THE TEST. HOW CAN HE/SHE FAIL?

SO NOW YOU'VE GOT THIS GREAT NEW GUY/GIRL AND YOU'RE IN LOVE RIGHT? RIIIIGHT...THINGS START TO SETTLE IN, CERTAIN THINGS BECOME A LITTLE ROUTINE, AND THEN YOU CATCH A GLIMPSE OF SOMETHING IN THIS NEW FACE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE. SOMETHING THAT ISNT EXTREME AS OF YET, BUT SOMETHING YOU KNOW YOU DONT TOO MUCH CARE FOR..BUT ALL IS WELL, YOU IGNORE IT BECAUSE THIS NEW FACE HAS BEEN SO WONDERFUL SO FAR. ANOTHER MONTH PASSES, NOW WE'RE COMFORTABLE. HE/SHE IS PRETTY CONFIDENT THAT YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE..NOW THEY CAN KICK THEIR FEET UP, LET THEIR HAIR DOWN AND JUST BE THEMSELF. MR/MRS. WONDERFUL ISNT LOOKING SO GOOD NOW. HE/SHE IS'NT SAYING THE THINGS THEY USED TO SAY, NOT DOING THE LITTLE THINGS HE USED TO DO. WHATS GOING ON?

IT'S SIMPLE..YOU FELL FOR SOMEONE YOU NEVER KNEW. YOU TRIED TO WRITE DOWN WHO YOU ARE ON A MENTAL NOTEPAD AND HAND IT TO HIM/HER AND EXPECTED THEM TO KNOW YOU AND LOVE YOU. HE/SHE DID THE SAME. BUT YOU SEE ON THAT NOTEPAD HE/SHE ONLY SEEMED TO WRITE DOWN THE GOODS AND BADS OF THE PAST. YOU ONLY SEEMED TO WRITE DOWN THE GOOD AND THE BAD OF THE PAST. BUT NO ONE HAS WRITTEN ON THIS MENTAL PAD THE GOOD AND THE BAD OF THE PRESENT. SO AS HE/SHE STARTS TRIPPING AND YOU GO BACK INTO YOUR MENTAL NOTES FROM THE PAST COUPLE MONTHS, YOU CANT SEEM TO FIND ANYTHING AS TO WHY HE/SHE IS ACTING THE WAY THEY ARE....BUT THIS IS WHO YOU LOVE RIGHT? RIIIIIGHT...

LOVE IS NOT BLIND. LUST BLINDS YOU. WHEN YOU LOVE, YOU ARE AWARE OF THE GOOD THE BAD AND THE UGLY, AND PUSHING TO IMPROVE THESE THINGS WITHIN YOURSELF AND WITHING THE NEW FACE. THE LUST FOR THAT PERSON AND/OR WHAT YOU FEEL THEY ARE CAPABLE OF DOING FOR YOU BLINDS YOU FROM THE THINGS THAT HE/SHE REALLY NEEDS TO WORK ON TO BE SOMEONE YOU COULD POSSIBLY LOVE SOMEDAY. HE/SHE FILLED THAT VOID OF LONELINESS, GAVE YOU SOMEONE TO TALK, A REASON TO CRACK A FEW SMILES. BUT HOW MUCH OF YOU IS THAT PERSON IN TUNED WITH WITHOUT YOU HANDING THEM THE ANSWERS ON THAT MENTAL PAD? HOW RIGHT WOULD THEIR ACTIONS BE, HOW RIGHT WOULD THEIR WORDS SOUND IF YOU HADNT GIVEN THEM EVERYTHING TO SAY AND NOT TO SAY? THINK ABOUT IT!!

"I LOVE YOU" SOUNDS GOOD, BUT IT FEELS BETTER! PROBLEM IS ALOT OF US DONT REALLY EXPERIENCE THAT FEELING. WE FALL FOR THE ONE WHO SEEMS TO BE GIVING US ALL THE RIGHT ATTENTION. BUT THE "ONE" WHO IS REALY PAYING ATTENTION HAS LEARNED THE DO'S AND DONTS WITHOUT YOU SAYING TOO MUCH OF ANYTHING. THEY AREN'T TRYING TO AWWW YOU, SEX YOU, OR CONTROL YOU..THEY ARE TRYING TO GROW, BECOME ONE WITH YOUR SPIRIT. TOO MUCH FOR ALOT OF US TO FATHOM....BUT THE "ONE" FOR YOU ISNT CONCENTRATING ON HOW TO BECOME YOUR GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND.

THE "ONE" IS FOCUSED ON IMPROVING HIM/HERSELF TO BE THE BEST HUSBAND/WIFE THEY CAN BE..HE/SHE FORSEES THE PERSON YOU WILL BECOME IF YOU GROW TO YOUR POTENTIAL AS WELL AS THE PERSON YOU WILL BECOME IF YOU FAIL TO GROW....THE "ONE" DOESNT WANT TO SEX YOU TONIGHT. THEY WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU ON THE HONEYMOON WITH NO REGRETS IF THE BLESSING OF A CHILD IS THE OUTCOME. THE "ONE" IS THE "ONE" WHO LOVES YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE YOU. SO WHO ARE ALL THESE OTHER INDIVIDUALS YOU SAY YOU LOVE/LOVED?

LOVE IS GODLY! SO HOW IS IT THAT WE CAN SAY WE LOVE SO MANY PEOPLE ONLY TO SEE SO MANY PEOPLE FADE AWAY?

GOD SAID TO US THAT HE LOVES US. WE DO HIM WRONG EVERYDAY, BUT DOES HE EVER LEAVE? DOES HE STOP LOVING? DOES HE FIND SOMEONE NEW TO TALK BAD ABOUT US TOO? IS HE A SUCKER FOR LUST? NO! HE'S TO BUSY LOVING ALL US SUCKERS FOR LUST!

WHEN YOU CAN LOVE SOMEONE AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH, NOWWWW YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT LOVE! UNTIL THEN, STOP TALKING ABOUT. JUST DO IT!

QUESTION OF THE DAY?

WHY ARE SO MANY OF US SO QUICK TO SETTLE FOR LESS THAN WHAT GOD HAS FOR US?

WHY IS IT SO HARD FOR SO MANY OF US TO RIGHTLY DIVIDE LOVE/LUST?